


Addiction

by SincubusMynx



Category: Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-01
Updated: 2017-11-01
Packaged: 2019-01-27 23:30:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,939
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12592968
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SincubusMynx/pseuds/SincubusMynx
Summary: Cullen is woken up from his nightmares and decides to sneak off to a hidden waterfall he discovered to relax. Little did he know he wasn't the only one wanting to bathe.





	Addiction

**Author's Note:**

> This was a fun little piece. I've had some major writers block with some of the others I haven't finished, so I wanted to take a break and have a little fun. 
> 
> `Hope you Enjoy`

‘Pain. Searing, mind numbing pain. My veins feel as though fire flowed through them. Muscles being torn and contorted. Sweat dripping from my forehead. Visions of twisted figures of the past, and distorted thoughts of the future. Glimpses of lyrium. Sweet Maker...lyrium. My bane. My weakness. The cool sensation. The peace of mind. No! Don’t remember. Forget the need. Forget the want. Forget the power. Shivers flowing through my body. Tears slowly moving down my face. Wake up. The pain reaching higher. My body is failing. Wake up. The damned siren song of the lyrium, pulling at my very core. Wake up. More visions. More terrors. Everyone dead. All I loved dead. My family is dead. My comrades are dead. My companions are dead, and her. Dear Maker, not her. The woman that shone like the sun among the stars. The woman that could dampen even the gnawing hunger for lyrium and silence even the torrent of nightmares. Please let her be safe, let her live. Don’t take her. Dear Marker, please let me wake up!’

 

Cullen awoke with a start. His body was shaking, twisted around the sheets. His pillows had been thrown on the floor and the leather bound journal he kept on his nightstand had fallen. Beads of sweat formed all over. His brain and body ached from the strain of his dreams. Every night since his decision to stop taking lyrium, his nightmares had gotten worse. Each morning, he woke drenched in sweat, shaking with tears streaming down his face from the visions swirling around in his mind. Each morning, he filled out his journal, detailing the dreams and thoughts swarming his mind in some attempt to keep track of his condition. The room above his office was a perfect sanctuary. His home. Cullen could hide from his men. Hide from his friends and more importantly, hide from her. Hide his weakness. With a grimace, Cullen pulled his heavy body towards the edge of the bed and sat up. His muscles screamed in protest. He let out a deep sigh as he wiped the remaining tears from his face and ran his hands through his blonde curled hair. His room had a large hole in the ceiling near the corner, which Cullen thanked the Maker for. The cool mountain air flowed in, cooling his body and his nerves. Glancing out, he noticed the moon was still in the sky, but only just. He imaged that it must be early morning. Perfect time to sneak out and bathe before waking his troops for training in the yard.

 

Pulling on a light white cotton shirt and halla hide pants, Cullen stood and stretched. “Better be quick” he said to himself. ‘Varric is normally up pretty early along with Cassandra. I need to get out of the castle grounds before they notice’ he thought to himself. After donning his boots, Cullen bent down to grab his journal. He considered just running out and writing everything down later, but a guilty pang hit his heart. So he grabbed the journal and made his way downstairs. Filling out a page and a half, he nodded to himself with satisfaction, before tying the journal up and making his way out the side door. There was a staircase not far from his office that led to and out of the grounds. The castle was silent. No troops practicing formations. No snorts of laughter from Sera and Blackwall with whatever prank they just pulled. But most importantly, no bustling nobility trying to annoy The Inquisitor with their nonsense and prattle. Cullen smiled slightly. The Inquisitor. How she hated nobility. More often than not, he had seen her scoff during one of their meetings when Josephine attempted to explain how important it was to keep up appearances for the nobles. Her nose wrinkling every time Leliana agreed and called it a ‘necessary evil’. Her honey chestnut hair falling in her face as she folded her arms and lay her head down on the table, trying to find a way to cope with their constant nagging. Her gold-flecked forrest green eyes peering over to him. That smile. Cullen’s insides squirmed. Now was not the time to be daydreaming. That woman’s smile was a like a breath of life to him and everyone seemed to notice how she affected him. Everyone but her.

 

Turning the corner of the castle entrance, Cullen continued down the mountain side, dodging small boulders and twigs that had fallen. The Inquisitor had insisted that a stone path be built up through the mountain to help fleeing villagers on their journey to Skyhold’s sanctuary. That’s where her heart was. She couldn’t care less about the nobility and their petty arguments. Her desire was to help those in need. She traveled to villages ruined by the warring between the Templar’s and the Mages and helped rebuild homes. She worked day and night to drive away anything that threatened their moments of peace. She welcomed all with open arms without discrimination. For she was an outsider herself. A Dalish elf, that most assume should be a servant of the Inquisitor, not the Inquisitor herself. Another smile crept onto his face as he slowed his walking. Halfway down the snow capped mountain side, off the stone path, was a little forest. The trees were tall and crowded, but in the center stood a small enclave. A Tall, partially crumbled stone wall half circled the area. Lush greenery filled every spot. Fireflies hummed softly created a dim glow. Near the center, water flowed over the top of the wall, down over rocks and bushes to create a makeshift waterfall that pooled in a shallow dent where smooth pebbles were lined in some kind of intricate design that looked ancient. This was his hideout. It was beautiful and serene. He looked forward to when his nightmares woke him early enough so he could escape, if only for a little while, to this cove. Wasting no time, Cullen pulled off his garments, folded and stacked them neatly on a dry nearby stone. Slowly walked in the crystal clear waters and made his way towards the waterfall. He felt the pin pricks of the ice cold water creeping up his calves as the pool of water grew slightly deeper finally reaching his thighs. The water was cool, but refreshing. He felt his muscles tighten as he braced to enter the falling waters. Head first, with small shivers, Cullen went under. The cool water flowed over him. Washing away the sweat. Washing away the pain. Washing away the visions. He let out a small sigh as he ran his hands through his now soaked hair. Cullen stretched and flexed his sore body, allowing the cool waters to hit and partially numb the pain. Eyes closed and just breathing slowing to enjoy his moment of peace. Unaware that someone else knew about this secret place.

 

Inside the high walls of Skyhold, Katarina woke with a start. Her breathing was ragged and her small body shaking. She let out a whimper as she closed her eyes tightly trying to block out the noise. Trying to block out the pain. It was no use. Since her return from the Orlesian Court, her dreams were filled with people in masks, pulling her this way, pushing her that way. All whispering. All judging. Each time, her dreams ended with the twisted face of Corepheus. That damned monster. Laughing and grinning madly at her as those people in masks held her down. Prevent her from escaping. Tonight’s dream was slightly different. Warm tears fell from her deep green eyes. Her hair stuck to her neck and face drenched in sweat. Those masks, those people, they were her friends. The people she trusted with her life. They were the faces under the masks. Laughing, pointing, holding her down. Hurting her. Killing her. Her chest tighten. “It was a dream. Just a dream” she told herself, standing up from her bed. ‘I must calm myself before every wakes.’ She decided as she shakily pulled on a thin tunic and leather pants. She grabbed a thin piece of leather and tied her shoulder length hair into a ponytail that held her drenched hair and scattered braids in tact. Walking towards the door, she stopped and glanced into her mirror, running her hand over the braids. After she returned from the Court, Dorian had noticed how visibly shaken the event had left her. He made a makeshift party for her with only the advisors and companions. They ate, drank and laughed throughout the night in the tavern. Near sunrise, Josie asked timidly to play with her hair. Dorian sat, supervising the whole exchange. Josephine had taken a few small handfuls of hair and intricately braided them, saying that her mother would do this when she was little, to help calm Josie’s nerves. The two braids curled around her pointed ears and fell near her shoulders. The last piece sat further up between her forehead and left ear, allowing a simple but beautiful combination. Since then, Katarina had asked Josie to do her hair at least once a week. She felt comforted as she felt the braids, as she chose to ignore the dark circles under her eyes and haggard appearance. She let out a heavy sigh before leaving her room. Slowly she made her way down the stairs and out of the castle. On the way out, she could hear muttering coming from the room Solas stayed in. She let out a small giggle. That stubborn man. Always spending more time dreaming in the Fade then in reality. Katarina followed the pathway out of the grounds and down the side of the mountain. No one knew about her secret spot. When the nobles became too much of a pain to deal with, or she received more reports of her troops being killed, she would run off to this spot to calm herself. This morning, Katarina didn’t pay any attention to the light footprints already leading off the stone path. She didn’t notice how the footprints led towards her secret grotto, nor did she notice the folded pile of clothes on a stone. The water was always so cold, too cold in fact for her. The first time she stumbled upon the grotto, she was so excited, she dove straight in, nearly freezing in the process. Since then, she put extra effort in her firebrand magic, so she could slowly warm the water the fell from above. Warm wind stirred up some leaves as they danced around on the ground and the thick trees surrounding the areas slowly swayed. Holding a hand up and muttering a incantation, warmth flowed from her hand to the top of the waterfall. It normally took a couple of minutes to warm up enough for her, so she sat down on a nearby boulder, closed her eyes and just listened to the water and the hum of the wind.

 

Cullen had realized his body was mostly numb now. The cool waters did their job and help ease the pain from the night's terrors. The only thing left, were the terrors of his own mind. He hung his head and allowed more water to rush over him. Just allowing himself to relax and attempt to think of nothing at all. Suddenly, the water felt warmer. Warmer than Cullen had ever felt it before. The combination of his now icey skin, being touched with the warmth of the water sent shivers up his spine. His muscles instantly released their tension. This was amazing. His body felt as though it was thawing only leaving relaxation behind. He let out a low guttural moan as feeling crept back into his body. Nearby, he heard a sharp inhale of air and the waters turned cold once more. Every nerve in Cullen’s body became aware he was not alone. His mind started to race. He was without his armor and sword, but he could still take down most foes. His Templar training was rigorous and thorough. His muscles tightened once again as he leaned his head out of the waters to listen closely. On the other side of the trees Katarina held her breath. She heard a moan and ceased casting and stood planted on the spot. Her heart was racing. ‘Who else could be here?’ She thought to herself. ‘This is my place. My special place.’ She thought growing angry at whoever was on the other side. She didn’t have her staff, so she knew her magic wouldn’t be as strong, but maybe it was an animal she could frighten off. She took a deep breath as she searched her mind for simple spells that would be effective. Her mind set and heart racing, she held up her hands ready at a moment's notice to cast as she stepped out from behind the trees and into the shallow part of the pool of water. 

 

There was an eerie calmness in the air. Almost as if time has stopped. No wind rustling through the trees. No leaves rolling along the ground. Even the water seemed to go silent as the pair stood face to face. Horror crossed Cullen's face, as pure shock crossed Katarinas. Neither one able to speak. As seconds passed, a light tint of pink colored Katarina’s cheeks. Up her face, under her pale, thin vine vallaslin and up to the tips of her ears. ‘Don’t look down.’ she told herself. ‘Don’t look down.’ she repeated in her head. And as if an act of pure rebellion, her eyes looked down and wided. She had never before seen a man bare, nor did she think the first one she would see would be the man that made her heart melt every time he spoke. Upon the realization of being bare, Cullen quickly tried to shield himself before Katarina could see, but his muscles weren’t cooperating as quickly as they should have been. He noticed the blush on her face and her eyes as they looked down a half second before he could cover himself. WHAM. His hands clutched over himself but let out a loud clap. Back to the awkward silence. Cullen now felt his face getting warm and knew he must be blushing from embarrassment. In an effort to break the silence, Cullen tried to break the ice. “S-so. Wonderful weather we are having.” Instantly he wished the Maker himself would strike him down. Weather? ‘You just flashed the woman of your dreams and the only thing you can talk about is the weather? Are you thick? What is wrong with you’ Cullen started thinking and hurling insults as himself for his stupidity. Unexpectedly, Katarina let out a small giggle. “Yeah, it’s is. At least here.” She said with a warm smile. “I’m sorry for intruding Cullen. I wasn’t aware anyone else knew about this place.” Katarina said with a hint of sadness. Thoughts moving too quick, Cullen blurting out, “I found it some time back, but you can have it!” a little louder than he meant to. Another giggle. “No, we can share. It’s nice to know you have found a way to let your guard down.” she said turning slightly so that a nearby boulder covered Cullen’s bottom half. Cullen’s face redden. “Actually, I wanted to ask you about that. Did..did you happen to make the water warmer? It’s normally ice cold, but not long before you appeared, the water..” Cullen ran a hand under the falls. “It slowly started to warm. It felt..amazing after numbing my muscles.” He said absentmindedly. Katarina blushed deeply. She knew her Commander had faced the horrors of mages and their twisted magic while serving in the Circle, so to hear him praising a simple spell she did caused her heart to jump. “I did. The cool water is nice when it’s hot, but I prefer the waters warm and steaming.” She said with a tone wanting. “W-well, does it take much to, I mean does it hurt when you, um...how long could you sustain...well…” Cullen stuttered trying to find how to phrase his very selfish request. Yet another giggle. He was glad he could at least make her laugh in this awkward situation. “Would you like the waters warm?” She asked simply. He nodded wordlessly. She stood and smiled. “I can make the waters warm for you, but it can be taxing. I normally start to heat the water while I’m making my way up the path, then continue once I have gotten in.” She explained, thinking of how long she could manage the spell outside of the calming waters. Cullen, yet again without thinking, said the first thing that came to mind. “Then come in with me.”

 

Thick silence hung in the air. ‘What in Maker’s name am I doing?!’ Cullen thought to himself. Inviting the woman he pined after, to bathe with him under a waterfall while she tempered the waters. This was something straight out of one of those romance novels Varric writes, not that Cullen read through them all, but rather skimmed the pages to satisfy his curiosity. Seconds felt like minutes in this silence. “I mean...you don’t have to. I didn’t mean...it was just a thought…” Cullen rubbed the back of his neck with his right hand and looked down into the pool trying to hide his embarrassment. A common reflex he had when he felt nervous. “Close your eyes.” Katarina whispered softly. Not expecting this, Cullen snapped his eyes back towards her. She was unbuttoning her pants. Cullen thoughts ran wild with ideas about what lie under those clothes, and what he would do to please her if given the chance. He only caught a glimpse before she noticed. “Cullen Rutherford! How shameful. Catching my own Commander peeping!” she said playfully, causing Cullen to launch into stuttering excuses and cover his eyes with his one free hand. If she was honest with herself, Katarina had no idea what she was doing either. Cassandra had lent her one of Varric’s novels and she pictured secret moments with her dashing Commander, but nothing quite like this. She finished removing her clothes and started to warm the waters. Her focus was strained as she tried to keep it on the spell, and not the handsome man that was standing nude in front of her. The pool of water started to warm. Cullen, whose body was still partially under the waterfall, let out a deep moan, letting her know the waters were warming. She walked to the center of the pool and stopped. “How hot can you take it Commander?” She asked, again with a tone of playfulness but in an attempt to gage how hot the waters should be. Lost in the pleasure of the warm waters, Cullen, again, said the first thing on his mind. “As hot as you want us to be” His voice low in almost a growl. He didn’t even blush at this. She was so close to him. He could feel her presence. He craved her. His boldness caused Katarina’s stomach to tie in knots. The water started to warm even further to the point that steam started to rise around them. Cullen opened his eyes to catch the outlines of Katarina, as the steam seemed to cover the parts he desperately wished to see. She was almost within arm's reach. She raised her arms up slowly until they were level with her shoulders, pulling up water and steam as she moved, forming a bubble around them. “This is to ensure no one else can peep” Katarina said softly as she moved towards Cullen. His heart hammering hard against his chest, Cullen watched as she moved closer to him, grabbed his left arm and slowly….turned him around?

 

This confused him as she push him up to the rocks pulling his arms up to brace against them and allowing the water to flow over them both. She leaned her body slightly on his bare back, her hands glided up as she stood on her toes to get closer. “How bad is it?” she asked softly in his ear. The vibrations of her voice, sent shivers down his spine. Her small fingers started to trace the scars and marks on his back “How badly have you been torn?” she asked voice shaking slightly. “How much of this has been the fault of my kind?” she asked again, following the longest scar that led around from his shoulder blade, to his chest; turning him slowly to face her. He opened his eyes. Her face was inches away. Her eyes were following her fingers, tracing around every mark. “Why wouldn’t you ask for help? We have healers. Why didn’t you ask me. I could have..” she said, voice suddenly filled with sadness. Cullen grimaced at her pain. “Inquisitor, not all scars can be healed. Not to mention, not all of these are from our war.” he said warmly, using every ounce of restraint he possessed to not look down. Oh the familiar sting of rejection. Even in this place, together, he still called her by her title. She glanced up to him, eyes brimming with tears. “Not all scars are physical either Cullen.” this took him by surprised as his brows furrowed with confusion. He had never seen her so shaken. “I’ve talked with Cassandra. I know you’ve told her about how you believe you are unfit to serve as my commander.” Katarina spoke, voice trembling. “You are stronger than the Lyrium.” Cullen’s insides jerked at the name. Yearned for it. “You are more than the strength it gives you. You are more than just my commander...at least, I want you to be..” She spoke tears welling up as she steadied her breathe. Cullen’s mind felt as if it were being torn apart. The mention of Lyrium caused his veins to burn with need, but before him, was his Inquisitor, no, his world. Even after the mention of the Lyrium that caused such a haze , that was nothing more than how he craved the woman in front of him. How he wanted her for his own. To consume her and feed into his addiction to her.

 

Without comprehension or even a second thought, Cullen softly grabbed ahold of Katarina’s arms and pulled her to him. The front of her body pressed against his as he cupped her face, traced her chin and pulled her in, to meet his lips. A fire lit inside of Cullen. Lyrium was nothing compared to this. Her lips were soft and warm. She smelled and tasted of lilac and honey. Katarina’s mind was wiped of any timid questions or any concerns. All she thought about in this moment, was him. She let her hands wander up his muscled chest and go around his neck as their kiss deepened. His tongue met with hers, crashing against one another. She loved the feeling of his scar pushing against her lips. His smell. His taste. How many nights had she stayed awake, daydreaming of this man. How many dreams had she had. Heavy breathes exchanged as he ran his hands down her back to rest on her hips. He felt the familiar pulsing sensation as he pushed onto her leg trying to tame himself. Breaking from the deep kisses, only for a moment, her words came out in a strangle whisper. “Cullen..” her voice was filled with want,and once again, Cullen struggled against his need. “Are you sure? I don’t want to force anything on you.” He said voice strained as he held himself back. Katarina smiled and curled her fingers through his hair. “Please..” she asked as her eyes burned with passion that broke his will. Cullen couldn’t hold back. Hearing her in such a state, was something he had only dreamed about. He slid his hands from her hips and grabbed her rear to lift her up, as she wrapped her legs around him. He turned them around so her back was pressed up against the flat stones. He leaned back slightly to take in the woman in front of him. “You’re so beautiful..” allowing his hands to roam over her body, tracing her pale vallaslin that curled its way down her stomach and legs. He pushed himself further on her, kissing her lips once more, moving to her cheeks, down to her neck, where he softly bit into. She let out a loud moan and dug her nails into his back slightly. “Don’t..” Katarina was struggling to make proper conversation. Her words and thoughts were all jumbled, being mixed into pleasure. Cullen misunderstood, and quickly pulled back again looking sheepish. “I..I’m sorry, Inquisitor, I should have, please forgive my..” before he could finish, Katarina pulled him closer, crashing her lips into his. After a couple moments, she stopped. “Do not misunderstand me Cullen, I want you. I’ve wanted you for a long time, but if you continue to only see me as your Inquisitor..” Cullen finally understood. He drove straight for her neck, nibbling slightly causing her voice to turn into a beautiful moan. Once again, she dug her nails into his shoulders as the sensation of his stubble and mouth rubbing against her neck drove her mad. She could feel his excitement as it was pushing hard into her thigh, as she wriggled attempting to pull it closer. Cullen noticed and happily obliged slowly pushing deep within her. “You’re mine Katarina..” he growled deeply at the intense pleasure he felt. Katarina, between gasps, agreed, as they both were too distracted for much more conversation.

 

Back at Skyhold, the castle seemed to be waking up. Varric had gotten up shortly after Cullen had walked through the grounds and caught Katarina following. He sat with a smug grin on his face, surrounded by his books and letters by the fireplace waiting for the others to wake. Some time passed, when Dorian and Bull made their way into the hall from the tavern, Cassandra not far behind them. Josephine and Leliana came from the war room and Sera groggily popped up from under one of the nearby tables she had fallen asleep under. The others huddled around Varric. “Well?” Cassandra asked shrilly as Varric let out a warm chuckle. “Well Seeker, looks like you owe me a sovereign” he said with a grin. Shock flashed across Cassandra's face. “What? She wouldn’t! They..when...how?” she stuttered, her face turning a bright shade of red. Dorian let out a laugh and Bull punched towards the sky. “All right! Boss made her strike.” Bull said with a bright grin. “It would seem so. I suppose it was a good idea to mention the little forrest spot to Cullen in the first place after all.” Dorian said with a naughty smile. “Yeah yeah Sparkler, you were right. But we really owe thanks to Ruffles and Nightingale for setting up our illustrious leader to the spot in the first place. How did you ladies find that spot?” Varric asked, furrowing his brow as he set down his quill and removed his reading glasses. Josephine giggled and Leliana rolled her eyes. “Really now Varric, my spies have been everywhere on this mountain, there is nothing they haven’t reported to me by now. But it was Josie’s idea to mention to the Inquisitor how she may find something interesting around the mountain side.” Leliana said with a grin. “I was only hoping to help her relax a bit.” Josephine stated face blushing. “Oh yeah, I bet she is reeeeally relaxed now.” Sera said with a snorting laugh. Varric stood up and pulled out a piece of parchment. “Well, time for business. Seeker, you and Buttercup and Iron Lady owe a sovereign each.” Sera and Cassandra let out a groan. “Sack splash. I was hoping you would forget.” Sera said pulling a gold piece from her pockets. “He is a greedy little dwarf Sera, he never forgets when it comes to money.” Cassandra said slapping her gold piece down. “Now now Seeker, you words wound me.” Varric said grinning wider than ever. “Now, that means that Sparkler, you and Tiny get two back, only because you bet together. Dorian pouted as Bull laughed. “Oh come now Amatus, it was your idea to begin with.” Bull said warmly. “Fasta vass, Festis bei umo canavarum” Dorian replied smugly. “Then it will be a good death.” Bull responded with a small hug around Dorian’s waist. Varric chuckled once more. “All right, that leaves two for Nightingale, six for Ruffles, and twelve for Chuckles.” Josephine’s face sank. “What? I thought I bet the highest!” she protested as the wooden door next to the group opened and Solas slowly walked out, grinning. “Well you would have, if I had not overheard the conversations prior. I’m not a big fan of betting..” He said raking in his pile of gold coins. “But when the odds are highly in my favor, how could I not?” He said smoothly as he returned back to his study leaving the group speechless. Varric shook his head slightly and laughed. “Alright, so who’s up for our next bet? How long before Curly or the Inquisitor slip up and let everyone know they are together?” he said putting his glasses back on and dipping his quill. The group erupted in calls of bets, ideas and laughter. Everyone was thrilled to help the pair get some well deserved romance and it didn’t hurt if they happened to make some coin off it too.


End file.
